Notes from The Hospital

At the Children's Hospital in Boston and have possession of my father's laptop, so I figured I would type random nothings.

1. I'm a little taken aback that my last entry had no comments at all. I'm not usually too fond of my entries but I liked that one. I guess what I like isn't what the people want, eh? I probably just got spoiled from the number of comments I had amassed of late in previous entries.

2. I have been wearing the same clothes for the last couple of days. Perhaps I should ask a nurse for one of those backless gowns, since this is pretty much home now.

3. I finally found where they keep the newspapers at the Barnes and Noble in Framingham; behind the register. This must be the anti-Ahleks policy. When I initially couldn't find the papers, I asked an employee and she told me matter-of-factly that they were, "behind the cash wrap-up" (I made it a point to say 'registers' instead of 'wrap-up,' when I repeated her answer aloud, never heard of a damn wrap-up) and that "you have to buy them before you can read them."

I did not like her tone one bit. Maybe the corporation has been keeping tabs on me spending hours on end in Hampton reading the papers in that store. Funny how that was a trip to Barnes and Noble in which I intended to be quick so I could grab some papers and go, but she gave me this condescending tone like I was looking to sit there and tear the papers apart.

I better not get back to Virginia and discover that they have taken up the same policy.

4. There is no stupid tax on the papers here like in Virginia. I can buy The Boston Globe and The New York Times and pay exactly $1.50, not friggin' $1.54, which I assume it would be in Virginia. It's always annoying that for a paper that is 50 cents, the price turns out to be 53 cents.

5. I can't stand the incessant beeping of these damn machines in the room. These things should only be beeping when someone is on the verge of dying, never before that. The machine that shows vitals is really an asshole. It seems the thing is so sensitive. When you move an inch, a number goes way off and then it will beep three or four times and then stop, only to start going again on what seems like intervals.

6. The prospect of dependence on a machine for life bothers me. I'm making this clear for anyone who might potentially have to be responsible for me; don't keep me alive for 15 years like Schiavo...just pull the plug.

A surplus of a drug like morphine also troubles me some. I guess I should be thankful for my own health, but I still wish I could switch places with my not-well partner in crime.

7. I hate the damn TV remote here. It only has one button and you can only go up channels, not the other way. This makes channel surfing pretty annoying; if I miss the channel I'm looking for, I have to strum through all the stations only to have to start over.

8. Being on the go this week has me looking like a hobo, complete with unkempt hair and a beard. I'm so lost, I'm surprised I know what day it is.

9. I was in the kitchen here fetching some ice and this fairly young woman asked me where the cups were; me being the gentleman that I think I am, I pointed her in their direction. She then asked me if I had a kid here too. I was like, "Me? Hell no!" Well I was a bit more polite than that, but that's what I was thinking. There will be no kids coming from these loins in a looong time, if at all.

When I answered no, I turned my head from my pilfering from the fridge and noticed she was gone quickly. I bet she was a single mother looking for a replacement baby daddy...I am not the one.

10. I have been living on their supply of pudding; you know how I feel about free edibles.

11. I got to ride in an ambulance for the first time on Thursday; that was interesting. The paramedic was pretty cool, he was a student at Umass Boston. He told this one joke that I made sure to remember: "How do you get someone with a doctorate in English to come visit you? ...Order a pizza."

I suppose they either deliver pizzas or they flock to homes to which pizzas are delivered.

12. I'm definitely writing a book at some point in my life, no doubt about that now. It is simply a matter of when.

13. The nurses here are on one end of the spectrum or the other. Either they are really good, or they are really crappy. Looks and age seem to have a direction relation with demeanor. The best nurse we have had so far is young and cute, the one we have right now is middle aged and crabby.

14. I'm yet to find a place to live in Memphis; that isn't good is it?

15. So mad that I can't get the third game of the San Antonio Spurs-Phoenix Suns series in here. We have been able to get ESPN, but when I checked for the game I could only hear sound, but no visual. What the hell?

16. I cannot even fathom the number of people whose asses I have wanted to kick this week. Seeing the whole medical system at work first hand has been a very intriguing experience to say the least.

This is my first time seeing someone in from check-in throughout the whole process. The fact that it is someone so close to me, I guess it's only inevitable that such ire grows within me.

17. I'm glad I have the sense of humor that I do. This has been a grueling week and that is one thing that helped me get through all this.

18. So tired, so so very tired. I can't seem to sleep much here, and when I try to nurses or doctors or barging into the room.

19. It has occurred to me how little some doctors really know as well as how uppity and cocky some of them are. The only reason we are at this hospital was because the doctors at the local hospital weren't "comfortable" with our situation.

Amazing how liability plays such a vital role in everything. This ties in with a story about Boston Public Schools I will expound on another time.

20. This is probably my shortest entry in a while. I've done a lot of reading and have more to write about, but I figure I would keep this one as short as possible -- though it turned out much longer than expected -- maybe it would be appreciated more. My brain is pretty fried as well, so this shall be it.